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Top 10 Female Celebrities with STDs

Using scientific methodology we have taken the most attractive celeberities infected with STD’s and determined which are the most attractive. each subject was given a total score or DRrf or Disease Risk Reward Factor taking account for physical appearance, wealth, and disease severity…

Jessica Alba

Using the STD rating system which accounts for severity of disease, likelyhood of infection, wealth and looks (see Figure-8 below the list) Jessica is the most desirable disease riddled starlet.

Her disease was apparently given to her by Derek Jeter. a former employee of her ex-boyfriend Cash Warren used to go out on runs and refill her Valtrex prescription on a regular basis

2008 STATSSTD RATINGLooksWealthSTD91%9$18mHerpes

 Kristanna Loken

Reportedly Kritanna passed the gift that keeps giving it to her boyfriend, Justin Whalin. Her most memorable role was as the female terminator in Terminator 3: Rise of the Machines. Being a converted fashion model the less she speaks the better when acting.

Loken stated in an interview with Curve magazine, “I have dated and have had sex with men and women and have to say that the relationships I have had with certain women have been much more fulfilling, sexually and emotionally, than of those with certain men… I connect with an aura, with energy. and if the person with whom I connect happens to be a female, that’s just the way it is. That’s what makes my wheels turn.”

2008 STATSSTD RATINGLooksWealthSTD90%9$3mHerpes

 Pamela Anderson

Pamela Anderson is making strong progress in her battle against Hepatitis C – her doctor has declared her fitter and healthier at 40 than she’s ever been in her life. In 2003, Anderson claimed she was not expected to live for more than 10 or 15 years after contracting the disease from ex-husband Tommy Lee – but last October the former Baywatch star announced her determination to defy all odds and cure the virus completely.

Her numbers would be higher, but her looks are on the downhill slope and she can’t rely on her acting skills to pay her phone bill.

2008 STATSSTD RATINGLooksWealthSTD84.7%8$75mHepatitis-C

 Victoria Beckham

Victoria Beckham the former Spice Girl turned freakish alien example of plastic surgery gone too far (ala Michael Jackson) would be the wealthiest on this list if her and her husband didn’t manage money like Fannie Mae. The poster couple for nouveau riche jet sets around the world buying up orchards and reportedly Victoria aka “Poche Spice” sports a seven million dollar ring.

Victoria probably picked up the Herp from one of her husband’s thousand plus groupie count.

2008 STATSSTD RATINGLooksWealthSTD72.8%6.5$125mHerpes

 Paris Hilton

Paris neglected to pay off her bills for a storage unit and her belongings were auctioned off. thanks once again to that storage locker which held more secrets than the chest in Raiders of the Lost Ark, a medical record/prescription info insert emerged for a drug called Valtrex, which is used to treat outbreaks of genital herpes.

The troubled celebutante, sort of actress, sort of singer was formerlly a professional heiress was but written out of the will for her crazy antics. that cost her more than fifty million dollars and at least two spots on this list.

2008 STATSSTD RATINGLooksWealthSTD70.67$12mHerpes

 Lindsey Lohan

This former child model went on to become a late-teen Disney movie star to wild party girl with not much of an acting future. By all accounts she has given up men and is set to marry Samantha Ronson within a year.

Prior to switching teams Lohan went through more male actors than a catering truck. she has recently taken a break from acting to drive under the influence and get back her girlish figure in rehab centers.

2008 STATSSTD RATINGLooksWealthSTD70.5%7$7mHerpes

 Alyssa Milano

Her career has tapered off since two succesful TV shows (Charmed and Who’s The Boss) and her career is mostly limited to B Movies and the Sci-Fi Channel.

She is sweet, loves sports and visits the troops so with her good looks you could probably put up with the odd flare up.

2008 STATSSTD RATINGLooksWealthSTD70.4%7$8mHerpes

 Britney Spears

Britney’s well telivised downward spiral has led her to wake up in more than one strange bed after a drug filled evening of partying. this former member of the Mickey Mouse Club even kissed Madonna on the lips, and that’s roughly equivelent to locking lips with a half dozen Bangkok prostitutes. she has been doucmented buying Zovirax in Kentwood.

The head shaving, well publicised drug problems, losing her children to Kevin Federline and massive weight gain have all taken their toll on her career and more importantly her cash supplies.

2008 STATSSTD RATINGLooksWealthSTD69.9%6.5$80mHerpes

 Janet Jackson

Janet Jackson had a list of her perscriptons leaked online.

She has the highest wealth on the list but looks too much like her child fondling brother Michael to score too high on this list. Besides at 42 she is one of the oldest on this list and is prone to massive (Oprah-esque) weight gains.

2008 STATSSTD RATINGLooksWealthSTD69.4%6$150mHerpes

 Katie Holmes

Katie seems like a nice enough child bride in the happy Scientology family. she would rank higher in wealth, but signed a $40 million dollar prenuptual agreement with Tom Cruise. I think for $40 million I would let the man nearly twice her age slobber all over me and give me herpes.

2008 STATSSTD RATINGLooksWealthSTD68.1%6.5$50mHerpes

 

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Top 10 Female Celebrities with STDs

Pay TV: Wednesday, August 29

Joan Rivers and daughter Melissa in Joan and Melissa.

Joan and Melissa: Joan knows Best E!, Wednesday, 8.30pm

VANITY reality shows tend to be the preserve of charmless, witless bores famous merely for being famous. It’s a rare treat to find one about someone as smart, talented and fiendishly funny as Joan Rivers.

The second season of this show finds the veteran comedian still living with her daughter, Melissa, in Los Angeles, and still working as hard as ever.

Sadly, she’s also still as keen as ever on cosmetic surgery, of which she has already had quite a sufficiency.

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In the make-up chair for Fashion Police (which follows at 9.30pm), Joan decides that a bit of flesh hanging underneath her chin needs chopping off.

Melissa, not unreasonably, fears that Joan could die on the operating table. so she arranges an intervention at which all their Los Angeles friends try to dissuade Joan from going through with it.

The show makes light of it, even inserting Intervention-style title cards into the action, but Melissa is deadly serious.

Joan, though, deftly derails the conversation by asking the assembled friends what they would like to have done if she were writing the cheques.

Almost everyone agrees they would have something done (this is LA, after all) and Melissa is defeated.

The one good thing to come of it all is the candid pre-surgery scene in which Joan – appearing on TV without make-up for perhaps the first time – has a touching heart-to-heart with Melissa.

There’s light relief in the subplot where Joan helps her grandson’s 10-year-old friend, Russell, with a stand-up comedy performance for a school project. ”You gotta be good, Russell,” she says. ”Because if you f— it up, it’ll scar you for life.”

Location Location Location Australia, LifeStyle, 8.30pm

Bryce Holdaway and Veronica Morgan help two couples look for houses in Sydney.

Botox-Mad Mum, LifeStyle You, 8.30pm

Profiles of women obsessed with plastic surgery and sundry cosmetic enhancements.

Angry Boys, Comedy, 8.30pm

Chris Lilley’s comedy series gets a new home.

Pay TV: Wednesday, August 29

Top 5 Celebrity Cosmetic Procedures Gone Wrong

Cosmetic surgery is designed to enhance the face and body as many decide they want to correct flaws in their own appearance. Those wishing for a boost in self-confidence often opt for cosmetic surgery, however not everyone receives the results they had so hoped for. below are 5 examples of high profile celebrities who invested in excessive amounts of cosmetic surgery:

Jocelyn Wildenstein, or more commonly known as: the ‘Bride of Wildenstein’, is a perfect example of how addictive cosmetic surgery can be. it is rumoured that Wildenstein has spent more than $4,000,000 on cosmetic treatments since the 1990’s. Unfortunately, her face has changed so drastically in recent years that it is impossible to identify the naturally beautiful, young lady portrayed in the 1970’s. Years of treatment have left Wildenstein’s face looking puffy and overly taut. furthermore, she has overindulged in Botox and her lips are now the dominating feature of her face.

Michael Jackson was undoubtedly one of the most talented performers of all time but was also known for being constantly criticised by the media, in regards to his personal life choices. Jackson underwent multiple cosmetic operations after wanting to change the appearance of his nose. Regrettably, his appearance changed so dramatically over the course of his life that he was virtually unrecognisable in comparison to photographs from when he was a young boy in the Jackson 5. it is thought that Jackson had more than 10 procedures to alter the way in which his nose looked. Jackson’s sisters, Janet and LaToya have also been slammed by critics for undergoing similar cosmetic procedures.

Pete Burns, famously known for his hit song, ‘You Spin Me round (Like a Record)’, has spent more than a decade altering his face. the 80’s pop star has had a number of facial treatments including lip enhancements and cheek implants. He revealed in an interview that he spent his life savings on corrective treatment for ‘botched lip treatment’.

Jackie Stallone: mother to an A-lister and the face of plastic surgery. Rocky Star, Sylvester’s mother has dabbled with a host of cosmetic treatments over the years. Procedures include: lip enhancements, full-face lifts, cheek implants and rhinoplasty. Viewers in the UK were shocked when she appeared on the popular TV show big Brother with puffy skin, spoiled lips and ‘surprised’ looking eye brows.

Since the end of Baywatch, star of the show Pamela Anderson has made news headlines as a result of dubious cosmetic procedures. Anderson is rumoured to have had several treatments, including breast implant surgery, which caused her once famous chest to become completely misshapen and unnatural in appearance.

There is no doubting that cosmetic surgery can enhance the way many look and create phenomenal results, but it’s important to be aware that there is a real risk in failure at any time. Choosing to undergo a series of treatments in a short space of time for vanity purposes usually results in the failure of surgery.

The Hills star, Heidi Montag, underwent 16 treatments in little more than a day and lost all traces of her natural, youthful beauty. one of the main problems with cosmetic surgery is that it becomes addictive. When one ‘flaw’ is corrected another one becomes apparent. despite receiving a series of treatments and spending huge amounts of money many are constantly disappointed with their appearance.

Learn more about how to do cosmetic surgery the right way with the help and advice of Cosmetic Surgery Consultants.

Top 5 Celebrity Cosmetic Procedures Gone Wrong

Why Lance Armstrong may lose all seven Tour de France titles (+video)

Never one to back away from a fight, Lance Armstrong is finally giving in and the cost of quitting is steep: his seven Tour de France titles could be gone as soon as Friday.

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The superstar cyclist, whose stirring victories after his comeback from cancer helped him transcend sports, chose not to pursue arbitration in the drug case brought against him by the U.S. Anti-Doping Agency. That was his last option in his bitter fight with USADA and his decision set the stage for the titles to be stripped and his name to be all but wiped from the record books of the sport he once ruled.

Travis Tygart, USADA’s chief executive, left no doubt that was the next step. he said Armstrong would lose the titles as soon as Friday and be hit with a lifetime ban, even though he is retired and turning 41 next month.

IN PICTURES: Lance Armstrong cycling career

Still to be heard from was the sport’s governing body, the International Cycling Union, which had backed Armstrong’s legal challenge to USADA’s authority. Tygart said the UCI was "bound to recognize our decision and impose it" as a signer of the World Anti-Doping Code.

"they have no choice but to strip the titles under the code," he said.

Armstrong clearly knew his legacy would be blemished by his decision. he said he has grown tired of defending himself in a seemingly never-ending fight against charges that he doped while piling up more Tour victories than anyone ever. he has consistently pointed to the hundreds of drug tests that he passed as proof of his innocence during his extraordinary run of Tour titles from 1999 to 2005.

"there comes a point in every man’s life when he has to say, ‘Enough is enough.’ For me, that time is now," Armstrong said Thursday night, hours before the deadline to enter arbitration. he called the USADA investigation an "unconstitutional witch hunt."

"I have been dealing with claims that I cheated and had an unfair advantage in winning my seven Tours since 1999," he said. "the toll this has taken on my family and my work for our foundation and on me leads me to where I am today — finished with this nonsense."

USADA treated Armstrong’s decision as an admission of guilt, hanging the label of drug cheat on an athlete who was a hero to thousands for overcoming life-threatening testicular cancer and for his foundation’s support for cancer research. Armstrong could lose other awards, event titles and cash earnings, and the International Olympic Committee might look at the bronze medal he won in the 2000 Games.

"It is a sad day for all of us who love sport and athletes," Tygart said. "It’s a heartbreaking example of win-at-all-costs overtaking the fair and safe option. There’s no success in cheating to win."

Johan Bruyneel, Armstrong’s longtime coach, said the Texan is a victim of a legal process run amok.

"Lance has never withdrawn from a fair fight in his life so his decision today underlines what an unjust process this has been," Bruyneel wrote on his personal website on Friday.

While Tygart said the agency can strip the Tour titles, Armstrong disputed that, insisting his decision is not an admission of guilt but a refusal to enter an arbitration process he believes is unfair.

"USADA cannot assert control of a professional international sport and attempt to strip my seven Tour de France titles," he said. "I know who won those seven Tours, my teammates know who won those seven Tours, and everyone I competed against knows who won those seven Tours."

Armstrong’s comments notwithstanding, USADA has exercised its power to sanction athletes and strip their results regularly. its website shows that it has issued 21 sanctions in 2012 so far in sports ranging from cycling to track to boxing to judo, with 17 of the athletes losing their results.

At the headquarters of Tour organizer ASO outside of Paris on Friday, spokesman Fabrice Tiano said Tour director Christian Prudhomme was not immediately available for comment because he was in urgent meetings about the case.

Armstrong walked away from the sport for good in 2011 without being charged following a two-year federal criminal investigation into many of the same accusations he faces from USADA.

The federal probe was closed in February, but USADA announced in June it had evidence Armstrong used banned substances and methods — and encouraged their use by teammates. the agency also said it had blood tests from 2009 and 2010 that were "fully consistent" with blood doping.

Included in USADA’s evidence were emails written by Armstrong’s former U.S. Postal Service teammate Floyd Landis, who was stripped of his 2006 Tour de France title after a positive drug test. Landis’ emails to a USA Cycling official detailed allegations of a complex doping program on the team.

USADA also said it had 10 former Armstrong teammates ready to testify against him. other than suggesting they include Landis and Tyler Hamilton, both of whom have admitted to doping offenses, the agency has refused to say who they are or specifically what they would say.

USADA maintains that Armstrong used banned substances as far back as 1996, including the blood-booster EPO and steroids, as well as blood transfusions.

"there is zero physical evidence to support (the) outlandish and heinous claims," Armstrong said. "the only physical evidence here is the hundreds of (doping) controls I have passed with flying colors."

Armstrong sued USADA in Austin, Texas, where he lives, in an attempt to block the case and was supported by the UCI. A judge threw out the case on Monday, siding with USADA despite questioning the agency’s pursuit of Armstrong in his retirement.

"USADA’s conduct raises serious questions about whether its real interest in charging Armstrong is to combat doping, or if it is acting according to less noble motives," such as politics or publicity, U.S. District Judge Sam Sparks wrote.

The ultra-competitive Armstrong still had the option to press his innocence in arbitration, which would have included a hearing during which evidence against him would have been presented. But the cyclist has said he believes most people have already made up their minds about whether he’s a fraud or a persecuted hero.

And so he did something virtually unthinkable for him: he quit before a fight was over, a stunning move for an athlete who built his reputation on not only beating cancer, but forcing himself through grueling offseason workouts no one else could match, then crushing his rivals in the Alps and the Pyrenees.

"Today I turn the page. I will no longer address this issue, regardless of the circumstances," he said. "I will commit myself to the work I began before ever winning a single Tour de France title: serving people and families affected by cancer, especially those in underserved communities."

Although he had already been crowned a world champion and won individual stages at the Tour de France, Armstrong was still relatively unknown in the U.S. until he won the epic race for the first time in 1999. It was the ultimate comeback tale: When diagnosed with cancer, doctors had given him less than a 50 percent chance of survival before surgery and brutal cycles of chemotherapy saved his life.

Armstrong’s riveting victories, his work for cancer awareness and his gossip-page romances with rocker Sheryl Crow, fashion designer Tory Burch and actress Kate Hudson made him a figure who transcended sports.

His dominance of the Tour de France elevated the sport’s popularity in the U.S. to unprecedented levels. his story and success helped sell millions of the "Livestrong" plastic yellow wrist bracelets, and enabled him to enlist lawmakers and global policymakers to promote cancer awareness and research. his Lance Armstrong Foundation has raised nearly $500 million since its founding in 1997.

Jeffery C. Gervey, chairman of the foundation, issued a statement of support.

"Faced with a biased process whose outcome seems predetermined, Lance chose to put his family and his foundation first," Gervey said. "the leadership of the Lance Armstrong Foundation remain incredibly proud of our founder’s achievements, both on and off the bike."

Questions surfaced even as Armstrong was on his way to his first Tour victory. he was leading the 1999 race when a trace amount of a banned anti-inflammatory corticosteroid was found in his urine; cycling officials said he was authorized to use a small amount of a cream to treat saddle sores.

After Armstrong’s second victory in 2000, French judicial officials investigated his Postal Service team for drug use. That investigation ended with no charges, but the allegations kept coming.

Others close to Armstrong were caught up in the investigations, too: Bruyneel, the coach of Armstrong’s teams, and three members of the medical staff and a consultant were also charged. Bruyneel is taking his case to arbitration, while two medical team staffers and consulting doctor Michele Ferrari didn’t formally contest the charges and were issued lifetime bans by USADA. Ferrari later said he was innocent.

Armstrong was criticized for his relationship with Ferrari, who was banned by Italian authorities over doping charges in 2002. Former personal and team assistants accused Armstrong of having steroids in an apartment in Spain and disposing of syringes that were used for injections.

In 2004, a Dallas-based promotions company initially refused to pay him a $5 million bonus for winning his sixth Tour de France because it wanted to investigate allegations raised by media in Europe. Testimony in that case included former teammate Frankie Andreu and his wife, Betsy, saying Armstrong told doctors during his 1996 cancer treatments that he had taken a cornucopia of steroids and performance-enhancing drugs.

Two books published in Europe, "L.A. Confidential" and "L.A. Official," also raised doping allegations and, in 2005, French magazine L’Equipe reported that retested urine samples from the 1999 Tour showed EPO use.

Armstrong fought every accusation with denials and, in some cases, lawsuits against media outlets that reported them.

He retired in 2005 and almost immediately considered a comeback before deciding to stay on the sidelines — in part because he didn’t want to keep answering doping questions. Three years later, Armstrong was 36 and itching to ride again. he came back to finish third in the 2009 Tour de France.

Armstrong raced again in 2010 under the cloud of the federal investigation. Early last year, he quit for good, making a brief return as a triathlete until the USADA investigation shut him down.

"he had a right to contest the charges," WADA President John Fahey said after Armstrong’s announcement. "he chose not to. the simple fact is that his refusal to examine the evidence means the charges had substance in them."

IN PICTURES: Lance Armstrong cycling career

AP National Writer Eddie Pells and AP Sports Writer Dennis Passa contributed to this report.

Copyright 2012 the Associated Press.

Why Lance Armstrong may lose all seven Tour de France titles (+video)

Duck calling championships happening in Kennewick on Aug. 25

From: The Seattle Times: Reel Time Fishing Northwest – 4:27pm – August 18, 2012

Calling all duck callers.The Washington Waterfowl Association in the Yakima Valley is hosting the Washington State Duck Calling Championship 7 a.m. Aug. 25 at at Columbia Park in Kennewick.The calling event will consist of these categories: 2012 Washington state Duck Calling Championship (winner will qualify for the 2012 World Duck Calling Championship to be held Thanksgiving weekend at Stuggart, Arkansas. This event is only open to Washington state residents); Open Duck Calling Contest (open to all callers); Junior Duck Calling contest (open to ages 11-17); Pee-Wee Duck (open to all children under the age of 11); Two-Man Duck (open to all ages); Junior Goose (open to ages 11-17); Washington State Goose ( open to Washington state residents only); Open Goose Contest (open to all callers); and Two-Man Goose Contest (open to all callers).for more information, call Abel A. Cortina at 50…

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Duck calling championships happening in Kennewick on Aug. 25

Is plastic surgery the answer for some bullied kids?

The issue of bullying, both online and in school, has come to the forefront in recent months. as parents and school officials struggle to come up with ways to curb incidences of bullying, one group of professionals who are lending a hand to kids in need may come as a bit of a surprise – plastic surgeons. CNN tells the story of one teen who recently received free plastic surgery to pin back her prominent ears.

Nadia Isle, a 14-year-old student, was harassed by other students at her school because of her ears, which stuck out dramatically from the side of her head. the abuse started back in first grade, and it caused the once talkative and outgoing girl to become reserved and shy.

At age 10, Nadia asked her mom if she could have surgery to pin back her ears, known as otoplasty. Eager to help her daughter, her mother began researching procedures and came across the little Baby Face Foundation, which provides free plastic surgery for kids in need.

The organization flew Nadia and her mother from their home in Georgia to new York so she could undergo the procedure. however, during the consultation with the doctor, he suggested that she receive an additional procedure to square out her chin and to straighten out her nose. According to the surgeon, once her ears were pinned back these other features of her face would be more pronounced.

Some people may question such extensive plastic surgery on a young person of Nadia’s age. for patients of any age, doing plenty of research before going under the knife, and having a thorough consultation with the board-certified plastic surgeon who will be conducting the surgery, is essential.

Plastic surgery has been shown to improve self-confidence among patients. A 2007 study published in the journal Plastic Surgical Nursing found that women undergoing breast augmentation reported boosts in self-esteem and sexual satisfaction after the procedure, reports PsychCentral.

“many individuals, including health care providers, have preconceived negative ideas about those who elect to have plastic surgery, without fully understanding the benefits that may occur from these procedures,” researcher Cynthia Figueroa-Haas told the news source.

Is plastic surgery the answer for some bullied kids?

Xzibit announces official Napalm album tracklist & featured artists including Dr. Dre, RBX, The Game, King T and the Alkaholiks, e-40 and more!

Posted 21 July 2012 by Billooh | |

Xzibit recently released the official track list for the upcoming new Xzibit album Napalm directly from his Twitter account.

The track list for Napalm:

01. “State of Hip Hop vs. Xzibit” produced by (Beat Butcher) 02. “Everything” (produced by Rick Rock) 03. “Dos Equise” feat. RBX 04. “something More” feat Prodigy of Mobb Deep 05. “Gangsta Gangsta” (produced by DJ Chill from CMW) 06. “forever a G” feat Wiz Khalifa (produced by E Dan) 07. “1983″ feat Trena Joiner (produced by Insane Wayne) 08. “Stand Tall” feat Slim the Mobster (produced by S1) 09. “Spread it out” (produced by 21 the Producer) 10. “Up out the Way” feat E-40 (produced by Rick Rock) 11. “Napalm” (produced by 1500 or NOTHIN) 12. “Meaning of Life” feat Ret. Staff Sargent Shilo Harris (US Army) 13. “Louis XIII” feat King-T & the Alkaholiks (produced by Dr. Dre) 14. “Enjoy the Night” feat David Banner & Wiz Khalifa & Brevi (produced by David Banner) 15. “Movie” feat Crooked I, Slim the Mobster, Game & Young DE (produced by Akon)  16. “I came to Kill” (produced by Ill Mind) 17. “Killers Remorse” feat Bishop Lamont, B-Real and Young DE (produced by Focus…)  18. “1983 StringAcapella”

Xzibit confirmed on his Twitter that the album will be out in September. the album will feature guest rappers such as: King T and the Alkaholiks, e-40, Dr. Dre, RBX, the Game, Rick Rock, B-real, Young De, Bishop Lamont and more!!! 

Stay tuned for more news on Xzibit's new album Napalm right here on XzibitCentral.com

Xzibit announces official Napalm album tracklist & featured artists including Dr. Dre, RBX, The Game, King T and the Alkaholiks, e-40 and more!

Is Plastic Surgery a Teen Thing?

For some teens, plastic surgery can be a godsend. But it has to be for the right reasons.

Source: WebMD

Emily was always made fun of for her rather large nose. then the summer before her senior year of high school, she got a nose job. All of a sudden, the same boys who called her Pinocchio and some other not-so-nice names were asking her out.

Sixteen-year-old Kimberly’s triple D breasts may have gotten the boy’s attention, but they made exercise — and even walking — painful. But a breast reduction has changed her life. now she can exercise freely — even jog without the back and neck pain that her large breasts once caused.

For teens like Emily and Kimberly, cosmetic surgery can be a godsend. But for others such as those who are urged by their parents, it may be ill-advised, prominent plastic surgeons tell WebMD. the key is making sure that the teen is emotionally and physically mature enough to undergo the chosen procedure.

Chemical Peels to Liposuction

For a whole slew of reasons — from its relative safety to its acceptance in society — plastic surgery is popular among people of all ages. the number of kids 18 and under having plastic surgery rose from just under 60,000 in 1997 to nearly 225,000 in 2003, according to statistics compiled by the American Society for Aesthetic Plastic Surgery.

A report that looked at eight years’ worth of data on teenagers found that the most common cosmetic procedures in teens are chemical peels and microdermabrasion to treat acne, laser hair removal, nose jobs, ear surgery, breast reduction, breast enlargement, chin augmentation, and liposuction to remove excess body fat.

In 2000, about 50,000 teens had chemical peels, and more than 21,000 underwent microdermabrasion. more than 15,000 teens aged 18 or younger had nose jobs, and almost 12,000 underwent procedures called otoplasty or ear surgery for protruding ears.

Male breast reduction was done in more than 2,200 young men with a condition called gynecomastia or male breasts, while more than 2,100 girls in this age group had breast enlargements — some of which are done to correct uneven breasts. Liposuction to reduce fat deposits in the trunk or chin was done in more than 6,200 people aged 18 or younger in 2000.

Why Teens Turn to Plastic Surgery

There are many reasons that plastic surgery is increasingly accepted among all ages, from teens on up.

“first, the surgery is safe; there are very few significant complications. Second, our society places a high premium on physical attractiveness and rewards those who are slender, youthful and handsome,” conclude study authors Mary H. McGrath, MD, MPH, and Sanjay Mukerji, MD, plastic and reconstructive surgeons at the George Washington University Medical Center in Washington, in a recent issue of the Journal of Pediatric and Adolescent Gynecology.

“Third, we live in a culture that emphasizes competition and legitimizes self-improvement as a way to gain a competitive edge and lastly, plastic surgery lives up to its expectations.”

In places like Brazil, sometimes called the new capital of plastic surgery, nips and tucks are fairly common — especially among beauty pageant contestants. Juliana Borges, 22, the new Miss Brazil who competed in the recent Miss Universe pageant, had plastic surgery four times and underwent 19 smaller cosmetic procedures. Borges had liposuction, chin surgery, fixed her nose and ears, and also had breast implants. In fact, some were suggesting that if she did win the Miss Universe title (Miss Puerto Rico won), the accolades should really have gone to her plastic surgeon.

What is Breast Augmentation?What is Breast Reduction?What is Rhinoplasty (Nose Correction)?GALLERY – Plastic Surgery before and after photos

Is Plastic Surgery a Teen Thing?

What My Son’s Disabilities Taught Me About ‘Having It All’

Because of her child’s problems, the author will never have a tidy, peaceful life. but none of this keeps her from being happy — as long as she asks herself the right questions.

The author on a walk with her son (Photo by Karl H. Jacoby)

As someone in her 40s, unequivocally in middle age, I find myself and my friends in that stage of life that seems to auger constant assessment — am I happy? Am I doing the right thing with my life?

Evidenced by the number times Anne-Marie Slaughter’s Atlantic piece “Why Women Still Can’t have It All” was posted on Facebook, it served as a cri de coeur of the collective unconscious of those of us swimming in the Gen X/Baby Boomer estuary, last stop before becoming truly elderly. (It’s apparently also the most-read article in the magazine’s 155-year history.) Slaughter rightly questions why having a family complicates the career ladder for women in a way that it does not for men. but the hidden heart of the article, I believe, is its hinting at that unspoken yearning for that perfect life that has been promised to us by … someone? Ads? TV? Ms. Magazine? Those ATHLETA catalogs?

Let me compare and contrast that with a typical incident that happened just last week in my own 40-something working mother life. My husband and I were sitting in the office of a neuropsychologist who had just run an assessment on our 12-year-old son who has a variety of disabilities and medical problems.

While our friends worry about middle schools, we bring our son to the ER to get stitches after he puts his head through a window.

“You know cognitively, he’s functioning at the bottom 1 percent of children his age,” he said.

“That means 99 percent of children are doing better than he is.”

I nodded again. (Yes, I can do the math.)

He waited, seemingly perplexed. “Having seen what I saw, and of course you have to be with your son all the time — I have to ask you, how do you have the patience?”

I looked at him. He’s my son. It was so obvious, I did not say it.

“I mean, really. How do you do it?” He looked to my husband, who gave him the same look. He tried a different tack: “Well, with all this stress, how are you two doing?”

“Fine,” we said, and meant it. He handed us the thick report, still shaking his head.

This is, sadly, a very typical exchange, not just with the experts in our lives, but even close friends: How do we stand our hellish life with a child who functions at 1 percent and starts to bite and hit when he is in situations he doesn’t understand — often, multiple times a day? once, watching our son having a hard time, a friend even blurted, “I’m so glad this didn’t happen to us!”

While our friends worry about the quality of middle schools, our parental duties include bringing our son to the ER to get stitches after he puts his head through a window, then arranging for a window replacement and for a special treatment for all the glass in our house so it won’t shatter — at a pretty penny. Other friends declare, “I couldn’t do what you do.” If I am to conform to their expectations, I’m not sure what I am supposed to do: Beat my son? kill myself? (Sadly, parents with kids like my son have done exactly that.)

Maybe it’s my Buddhist outlook, but I’m not consumed with worry and frenzy and despair like I’m “supposed” to be. I don’t enjoy that my 12-year-old son is still in diapers and sometimes purposely makes a mess in the bathroom. Or that he dumped his Thanksgiving dinner on my sister-in-law’s pregnant belly. Or that he screams in the parking lot of whole Foods until people call the cops on us. on the other hand, he is my son, and he is what I have. and he has a nice smile.

When I look at friends and acquaintances, many with perfectly beautiful children and wonderful lives, and see how desperately unhappy or stressed they are about balancing work and family, I think to myself that the solution to many problems is deceptively obvious. We are chasing the wrong things, asking ourselves the wrong questions. It is not, “Can we have it all?” — with “all” being some kind of undefined marker that shall forever be moved upwards out of reach just a little bit with each new blessing. We should ask instead, “Do we have enough?”

The New York Times’ travel section had a piece on Providence, Rhode Island, where we live. It mentioned that our city is extremely affordable, but filled with many fun and interesting things to do, such as going to Venda Ravioli on Federal Hill (Providence’s version of Little Italy) and procuring amazing hand-made ravioli filled with anything from homemade ricotta cheese to lobster. It’s something our friends do all the time: visit the quaint neighborhood, walk around with an Italian ice, and pick up dinner. Our son has digestive problems and can’t eat wheat or dairy, and much of his food has to be soaked and fermented beforehand. in addition, he has a hard time enduring crowds in small spaces. Ergo, despite our 15 years here, we have never been to Venda Ravioli, and probably never will.

Do I sit at home stewing over being denied a Venda Ravioli night? not any more than I sit stewing that I’ll probably never get to experience space tourism. and it’s not that I go through my life like the implacable Buddha, always in the present, dealing with what needs to be dealt with in a state of serenity and calm. My life — obviously — has many frustrations and disappointments (our son poured out his vegetable juice on our wooden table this morning). but one thing I’ve learned is that the minute I start fixating on what I don’t have — time, money, a child I can send to camp for the summer, central air conditioning — I just feel that much hotter and put-upon, and those bad feelings seem to attract extra obstructions to my day.

Another instructive moment: while packing for our upcoming move to New York City, we are in the process showing our house for rental (again: “How can you handle the stress?”), and the ramping-up of our culture’s “have-it-all” standards are exemplified in our 1969 GE Hotpoint stove. My husband and I make three meals a day from scratch on that trusty workhorse. a decade ago, we easily rented our house out when we went on sabbatical.

Now, despite beautifully redone bathrooms and yard, and EPA-approved lead abatement for families with children, our realtor tells us we have a problem: the stove. It has to go, he tells us. not because it doesn’t work — it still works great — but because people “expect” certain things. My husband and I were aghast as we pondered a major stove upgrade, but then we recalled acquaintances with gorgeous Viking stoves that sit unbesmirched by actual cooking, almost as if the stainless professional-quality stove is more prop than appliance, a requirement for kitchen happiness in the modern world. to look at our house, then, is to see the glaring absence of a Viking in our kitchen.

When people ask, “How are you not exploding with stress with everything on your plate?”, I know they only mean it in the best, most compassionate way. and for those who have beautiful healthy children and gleaming new stoves, I do not discount their heartaches and worries and crises. but what bothers me is the implicit expectation: that people are waiting for our inevitable breakdown, a breast-beating howl against fate that is sure to come once we realize we’ll truly never “have it all” — because of our imperfect son.

For all the people who are puzzled by my seeming happiness, I’ll be glad to let them know my “secret.” I’m not in denial, I’m not on antidepressants, and I don’t live in a fantasy world. I have a wonderful husband and I am pursuing a career I’ve dreamed of since I was nine years old. I have a beautiful son, friends, and a working stove. I am not paraplegic. I have parents who, through luck and fate, had me here in the United States, and not in North Korea. I live in a time where my awful vision can be corrected with glasses. I am a college graduate. I am never hungry unless I choose to be.

Do I have enough? Resoundingly: yes. and I ask you to take a moment: I suspect you might, too.

What My Son’s Disabilities Taught Me About ‘Having It All’

If You Want The Perfect Liposuction Experience, Find The Perfect Surgeon

If you are intrigued by the possibility of liposuction but concerned about the potential for side effects or cosmetic flaws, then the very best thing you can do for yourself is put some time into finding the very best surgeon your money can buy. a skillful surgeon is the number one predictor of whether or not a patient will be satisfied with the results of their liposuction. Skillful surgeons understand the aesthetics of the human body, and how that aesthetic can change from person to person, especially across racial or cultural boundaries. they know how to remove fat strategically to give the best possible results, and how to sculpt what remains into the most pleasing shape.

In addition, skillful surgeons are better equipped to deal with the potential medical complications of liposuction, including reactions to anesthetic, excessive bleeding, blood clots, and nerve damage. they have plenty of experience with the equipment they are using as well as with the staff they work with, and they know how to get the best possible work out of them all.

So how does one go about finding a skillful surgeon to perform liposuction? the most obvious things to look for are a surgeon who has spent at least five years in the business and has performed at least one hundred procedures. This is important because while some doctors specialize in liposuctions and perform two or three a day, some focus on other things and only perform liposuction rarely, once or twice a month or even less. these surgeons obviously won’t be as familiar with the procedure, and will be less likely to give consistently good results. Prospective clients should also make sure any surgeon they consider is board certified and properly trained in the technique they use.

If you are considering getting liposuction and are still not sure which surgeon to pick, one very good thing to do is set up consultations with the ones at the top of your list. most clinics offer at least one free consultation to prospective patients, so there really isn’t a downside. At the consultation, you can check the surgeon’s credentials, and also ask to see some before and after pictures. these will give you an idea not only of the surgeon;s level of skill, but also of his personal aesthetic. Since liposuction is as much an art as it is a science, you will want to look for someone who shares your opinions about what is and isn’t beautiful.

If You Want The Perfect Liposuction Experience, Find The Perfect Surgeon